Barack Obama is a Jedi

If President Barack Obama had the mind control powers of a powerful Jedi, he probably wouldn’t be having so much trouble with health care. Eg., “These aren’t the regulations you’re worried about. Move along.”

But, that hasn’t stopped him from trying. Insert your “It’s a TARP!” jokes.

No, the President isn’t joining Princess Biden in a war against Darth Aetna. Turns out he was doing a publicity photo shoot promoting Chicago for the 2016 Olympics. We’d scoff at the idea that the Windy City would get the Games, but the town gave the podium for a black man with a funny name to become the president of the United States, so we’ll see how this shakes out.

However, if Obama could outfit the U.S. fencing team with lightsabers, we could bring home the gold in that event.