The State Ethics Commission report on Gov. Mark Sanford’s indiscretions regarding use of state money and campaign dollars was released today, but we’re not sure if this thing is really worth a damn or not. A few of these charges, here or there, might lead to a fine or a stern rebuke from the General Assembly. But, when they come across, one after one, it looks like the members of the House may have a case. According to the report, there will be a hearing at SEC offices at an undisclosed date to deal with the findings.

USE OF PUBLIC OFFICE FOR PERSONAL FINANCIAL GAIN
Section 8-13-700(A), S.C. Code ann., 1976, as amended
37 counts

Upgrade on flight

• Graz, Austria to Frankfurt, Germany (2005)
• Frankfurt, Germany to Charlotte, N.C. (2005)
• Chicago, Ill. To Tokyo, Japan (2005)
• Tokyo, Japan to Shanghai, China (2005)
• Beijing, China to Chicago, Ill. (2005)
• Charlotte, N.C. to London, U.K. (2006)
• London, U.K. to Charlotte, N.C. (2006)
• Charlotte, N.C. to Munich, Germany (2007)
• Munich, Germany to Paris, France (2007)
• Munich, Germany to Charlotte, N.C. (2007)
• Washington, D.C. to Beijing, China (2007)
• Beijing, China to Washington, D.C. (2007)
• Columbia, S.C. to Atlanta, Ga. (2008)
• Atlanta, Ga. to Sao Paulo, Brazil (2008)
• Cordoba, Brazil to Buenos Aires, Argentina (2008)
• Buenos Aires, Argentina to Atlanta, Ga. (2008)
• Upgrade on flight from Charlotte, N.C. to New York, N.Y. (2009)
• Upgrade on flight from New York, N.Y. to Warsaw, Poland (2009)

Improper use of state plane

• Spartanburg, S.C. to Clemson/Oconee County for a county party dinner (2005)
• Columbia, S.C. to North Myrtle Beach, S.C., transporting a Governor’s Office staffer, then North Myrtle Beach, S.C. to Columbia, S.C. for staffer and himself to receive a haircut (2006)
• Columbia, S.C. to Mt. Pleasant, S.C. for a book signing (2006)
• Mt. Pleasant, S.C. to Aiken, S.C. for a birthday party for a contributor (2006)
• Lewisburg, W.Va. to Brunswick, Ga. for family for a personal weekend (2006)
• North Myrtle Beach, S.C. to Columbia, S.C. for son’s sporting event (2007)
• Columbia, S.C. to Greenville S.C. for House Republican Caucus reception (2007)
• Columbia, S.C. to Greenwood, S.C. to Charleston, S.C. for Reason Weekend dinner (2008)
• Columbia, S.C. to Myrtle Beach, S.C. for family to attend “soft” opening of Hard Rock Park (2008)

Campaign funds for personal use

• Receiving $40 for activity not related to the campaign (2006)
• Receiving $329.40 for expenses from attending the Alfalfa Club Dinner in Washington, D.C. (2007)
• Giving $610.30 to staffer Marisa Crawford to attend the Republican Governors Association meeting (2007)
• Receiving $181.23 for direct marketing, telephone, Internet and/or cable services at the Governor’s Mansion (2008)
• Receiving $280.16 for direct marketing, telephone, Internet and/or cable services at the Governor’s Mansion (2008)
• Receiving $297.89 for direct marketing, telephone, Internet and/or cable services at the Governor’s Mansion (2008)
• Receiving $864.90 for expenses from the Republican Governors Association meeting and a hunting trip in Ireland (2008)
• Receiving $79.95 for direct marketing (2009)
• Receiving $96.95 for direct marketing and a presidential inauguration ticket (2009)
• Receiving $159.90 for direct marketing (2009)

S.C. Ethics Commission report

It’s been roughly 36 hours since Alabama beat Virginia Tech in Atlanta, and our minds have finally become sane enough to filter what happened and look at it like the good sportswriter we used to be. But, yea and verily, that’s still not possible. We’re Tide fans. And, fall means pure fucking insanity. Loss of control. It’s an addiction worse than any drug. It’s imprinted into the DNA. You can’t stop it, you can only hope to contain it.

And that’s not going to happen, my good sir.

So, WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ROLL TIDE! HEY HOKIES! WE JUST BEAT THE HELL OUTTA YOU! RAMMER JAMMER YELLOW HAMMER GIVE ‘EM HELL ALABAMA! WOOOOOO!

With that out of the way, Bama’s win over another Top 10 team in another opener in another game in Atlanta can be spun any number of ways. The Crimson Tide defense put a lock-down on Nouveau Vick, and stopped the Virginia Tech running attack for the most part. Alabama’s offense racked up an amazing amount of yards on what’s supposed to be a pretty good defense. Quarterback Greg McElroy didn’t have to depend on premier receiver Julio Jones, who was shut down by the Hokie secondary. Running back Mark Ingram had a career day. Baby Tiffin went 4-for-5 on field goal attempts.

But, there’s a reason Tech was up by one going into the fourth quarter. Special teams. Turnovers. Dumb mistakes. For three quarters, it looked like Alabama desperately wanted to give the game to the Hokies. Long drives were ending in field goals, or no points at all, which was a hallmark of the disasterous Mike Shula era. McElroy looked lost for much of the game. Thank God that Tide legend Shaun Alexander was on the sideline to coach him up and get his head right.

But, the fact that Alabama could screw up that bad and still win by 10 points against a very good team should scare the hell out of every team in the SEC that doesn’t have a Tebow on its roster. It still doesn’t make us happy. Well, happy for the win, but still anxious about the rest of the season. Fortunately for everyone involved, the Tide gets Florida International and North Texas before the SEC opener against Arkansas.

UAB 44, Rice 24
How about them Blazers, eh? UAB quarterback Joe Webb racked up crazy amounts of fantasy points, and real ones, taking out the Owls at Legion Field. Several days ago, we wondered, “Where is the Gene Bartow of UAB football?” Bartow came from UCLA to start the UAB basketball program in the late ’70s, taking the team to the Elite Eight in a few short years. Ole Miss coach Andy Kennedy played for Bartow — and we’re proud to say he started in the first sporting event we ever attended.

For a long time, the powers that be in Alabama didn’t want to see UAB get a football program. The state’s loyalties are split between Alabama and Auburn, and a team at a big public university in the state’s biggest city set up to be an issue in recruiting. However, in the early ’90s everything worked out and the program began. But, with the exception of a stunning win at LSU in 2000, the Blazers haven’t done much.

Maybe current coach Neil Callaway, in his third season, could be the guy to make UAB a mid-major success. Beating a conference opponent by 20 is a nice way to start the year. If he can keep the team playing at this level, maybe a few more people might roll out to the aging monument to football in which the team plays.

Carolina 7, N.C. State 3
Dear USC, please stop doing this. We’ve watched your team play in ugly opening games since 2005, and we’ve had enough. Have the guts to tell ESPN to put something interesting in this slot at the First Thursday game next year. Also, it appears Georgia sucks, so, hey, 2-0?

Alabama defensive end Brandon Deaderick didn’t have a good time Monday night, when he was shot twice — once in the arm, once in the leg, in a botched robbery attempt. Per The Press-Register‘s Gentry Estes, the shots inflicted “little more than a flesh wound.” How much of a badass do you have to be to get plugged twice and have it not be that big of a deal?

Head coach Nick Saban is playing the cautious had, though, saying that Deaderick will probably miss the opener against Virginia Tech on Saturday. It was up in the air, as Deaderick was released in less than 24 hours from DCH Regional Medical Center in Tuscaloosa.

It is a significant loss for the Bama defensive line, as the senior started all 27 games the past two seasons, racking up 36 tackles and four sacks in 2008. He’ll be replaced by sophomore Marcell Dareus, who was rated as a four-star prospect and the No. 5 defensive tackle in the nation coming out of Huffman High School. He won the Alabama spring game’s lineman of the game award, so the talent is there, if the experience is not.

It’s been a while since we could predict that Alabama would be good season-in and season-out (like, say, 1989-1996), so we’re getting ready for the 2009 season by getting hyped with the best highlight videos from last season’s 12-0 regular season campaign.

For those of you who don’t understand what it’s like to expect excellence from your favorite football team every year, we feel bad for you, son. Actually, no, not really. Expecting mediocrity would be much easier than having to deal with the the letdowns of the past decade of Crimson Tide football (you have it easy, South Carolina). But, we’re pretty excited and can’t wait to see Bama wipe out another ACC team in the Georgia Dome.

Alabama v. Clemson

Tulane v. Alabama

Western Kentucky v. Alabama

Tuesday afternoon Upstate TV station WYFF received information saying that Gov. Mark Sanford, and the SLED vehicle he absconded with, were spotted at Hartsfield-Jackson Airport in Atlanta. The surprising thing is that said SLED SUV wasn’t found at a parking lot near the Appalachian Trail, but indeed at that airport. Immediately, the questions begin — was Sanford not hiking? Where was he flying to, and from?

In what was an unsurprising move, the governor’s office stuck by their original story (finally developed at 10 p.m. Monday night) and refused to comment on this new development. We have heard that Thomas Ravenel has moved to New York (or at least bought an apartment there), so maybe Sanford was flying to see his bud.