There are 34 bowl games this year, and we’re picking every damn one of them (probably with 60-70 percent success). You can follow the progress or join up and do battle with us through ESPN College Bowl Mania. We’re in “The League” and “The War Against Tebow.” TWAT (jokes!) is the brainchild of decamped S.C. blogger and good time Johnny, Micah Snead, so go there. But beware — Snead’s dad is a total ringer and will probably take the title by 20 points.
Dec. 19, 4:30 p.m., ESPN
Fresno State v. Wyoming
Dec. 19, 8 p.m., ESPN
Central Florida v. Rutgers
Dec. 20, 8:30 a.m., ESPN
Southern Miss v. Middle Tennessee State
Dec. 22, 8 p.m., ESPN
No. 18 Oregon State v. No. 14 BYU
Dec. 23, 8 p.m., ESPN
No. 23 Utah v. California
Dec. 24, 8 p.m., ESPN
Nevada v. Southern Methodist
Dec. 26, 1 p.m., ESPN
Marshall v. Ohio
Dec. 26, 4:30 p.m., ESPN
No. 17 Pitt v. North Carolina
Dec. 26, 8 p.m., ESPN
Boston College v. No. 24 Southern Cal
Dec. 27, 8:30 p.m., ESPN
Kentucky v. Clemson
Dec. 28, 5 p.m., ESPN2
Texas A&M v. Georgia
Dec. 29, 4:30 p.m., ESPN
UCLA v. Temple
Dec. 29, 8 p.m., ESPN
No. 15 Miami v. No. 25 Wisconsin
Dec. 30, 4:30 p.m., ESPN
Bowling Green v. Idaho
Dec. 30, 8 p.m., ESPN
No. 20 Arizona v. No. 22 Nebraska
Dec. 31, Noon, ESPN
Houston v. Air Force
Dec. 31, 2 p.m., CBS
Oklahoma v. No. 21 Stanford
Dec. 31, 3:30 p.m., ESPN
Navy v. Missouri
Dec. 31, 6 p.m., NFL Network
Minnesota v. Iowa State
Dec. 31, 7:30 p.m., ESPN
No. 11 Virginia Tech v. Tennessee
Jan. 1, 11 a.m., ESPN
Northwestern v. Auburn
Jan. 1, 1 p.m., CBS
No. 16 West Virginia v. Florida State
Jan. 1, 1 p.m., ESPN
No. 13 Penn State v. No. 12 LSU
Jan. 1, 4:30 p.m., ABC
No. 8 Ohio State v. No. 7 Oregon
Jan. 1, 8:30 p.m., Fox
No. 5 Florida v. No. 3 Cincinnati
Jan. 2, Noon, ESPN2
South Florida v. Northern Illinois
Jan. 2, 2 p.m., ESPN
South Carolina v. Connecticut
Jan. 2, 2 p.m., Fox
No. 19 Oklahoma State v. Ole Miss
Jan. 2, 5:30 p.m., ESPN
Arkansas v. East Carolina
Jan. 2, 9 p.m., ESPN
Michigan State v. Texas Tech
Jan. 4, 8 p.m., Fox
No. 6 Boise State v. No. 4 TCU
Jan. 5, 8 p.m., Fox
No. 10 Iowa v. No. 9 Georgia Tech
Jan. 6, 7 p.m., Fox
No. 25 Central Michigan v. Troy
Jan. 7, 8 p.m., ABC
No. 2 Texas v. No. 1 Alabama
We’ve been leery of U.S. Senate candidate Marco Rubio, because he seems like, oh, a competent version of Gov. Mark Sanford, but you can put the nail in the coffin of Fla. Gov. Charlie Crist, Rubio’s opponent in the Republican primary. Why might that be? Crist just allied himself with Florida State coach Bobby Bowden.
We should be backing Bowden, too. After all, he’s from Birmingham and played quarterback at Alabama before transferring to Samford. But, his days of being a good coach have passed him by. It was thought that happened to Penn State’s Joe Paterno, but the zombie they have coaching the Nittany Lions managed to turn it around. No such miracle looks like it’s in the works for Bowden. It’s been years since the team was relevant, and the state is effectively Florida’s these days. All roads, or at least I-75, lead to Gainsville.
Then there was the news conference recently in which it seemed Bowden was unaware of what happened during the game. In all seriousness, the exchange with the reports had all the markings of dementia, which is bad enough when you have to deal with it with a family member in private. When it’s a coach at a major school, it’s especially bad. Bear Bryant knew when to go before it got this bad. He had already delegated much of his duties to his assistants by the time the 1979 national championship rolled around. The ’80-’82 seasons showed a precipitous decline, though, and Bryant stepped aside. Shortly after, he was dead. We have a feeling that’s what’s driving Bowden. He’s coaching to live, literally. It would be the same for Paterno, but he’s the living dead. The only way he’s going down is a well-placed spiral to the noggin.
Anyway, here lies the problem for Crist. How do you support a coach who is unpopular among his own fan base, and considered a joke by Florida and Miami partisans? In USA Today, Crist said Bowden should be able to return next year, adding, “I would certainly urge the school to do that. I don’t think I’ll have to urge them too hard, because the man is beloved. He really is.” Crist also said he’d be “heartbroken” if Bowden is forced to resign (or straight-up fired).
Crist has been pretty popular as a governor, and beat the hell out of his Democratic opponent in 2006. You would think he’d be smarter than casting his lot with Bowden, but he must not have been taking the pulse of Florida’s football public in the past few years.
Nike’s bizarre, “tradition ain’t shit” uniform policy will befoul a number of teams for the rest of the month. Alabama, thank God, has been limited to the swoosh, the NCAA-mandated conference pennant and the script A, through there was that houndstooth collar mess for the 2006 Ole Miss game.
It appears the garish ensemble will come out for the Florida State game (but there hasn’t been a definitive statement). The Seminoles will also be wearing the misfit creation, with a black helmet. Don’t drink too much, as you might not recognize who’s on the field. We haven’t found a picture of the side of the Florida helmet, but unless it’s got the old-school F on that white melon case, it’s going to be even more strange. Throw a blue helmet on there, and you’d swear it’s Kentucky.
The other ones are even weirder. LSU’s look like a direct rip from Washington. The helmets are gold. TCU’s entry has pants that look like scales and red stripes on the helmet. Horned frogs, you see, shoot blood out of their eyes. Miami has two-tone numbers, but the only tradition there is thuggery and fairweather fans, so that’s no big deal.
Saturday was not a good one to be an overwhelming favorite. A number of solid teams encountered the growing trend of mid-major and minor football programs having players with enough talent to scare the holy hell out of, and sometimes beat, the big teams.
ALABAMA 40, FIU 14
We caught this pay-per-view affair over a pirated Internet feed, which we’re sure created about four more ulcers. At halftime, the Crimson Tide seemed to be channeling Bama ’94, in which the team had an underwhelming lead on UT-Chattanooga in an early season game in Birmingham. But, like that team, this one felt its oats in the second half, and outscored FIU 20-0 to finish off the game.
However, FIU did expose to glaring weaknesses in the Tide. The secondary really sucks. Sometimes. The kick return defense really has problems. Two games, two kickoff returns for touchdowns.
And now, excuses! It seems like coach Nick Saban pulled a move more commonly associated with European soccer teams — starting lower-level players against lower-level competition, and keeping out lightly-injured stars. Hence, third-string running back Trent Richardson saw a lot of touches, wide receiver Julio Jones spent most of the game on the sideline, as did second-string running back Roy Upchurch.
“Trent Richardson got more of an opportunity in this game. We knew he would with Mark [Ingram] being sick all week. But Mark played well in the game as well. Trent did a great job,” said Saban in The Tuscaloosa News.
Ingram had the dreaded swine flu.
In the end, Alabama quarterback Greg McElroy had an absolutely great day, stat-wise, going 18-of-24 for 241 yards and a touchdown. Richardson topped 100 yards rushing.
FLORIDA STATE 19, JACKSONVILLE STATE 9
The bizarro Gamecocks took the Seminoles into the fourth quarter with a 9-7 lead, and for a second it seemed like the ACC would have another team gloriously shit the bed. But, like lower-level teams usually do, Jax State made enough mistakes to allow FSU to win in the final minutes. For other examples, see MARYLAND 38-JAMES MADISON 35 and NORTH CAROLINA 12-UCONN 10.
In other news, Kansas State lost to UL-Lafayette, Texas had early trouble with Wyoming and Houston beat Oklahoma State.
THE BIG ONES
Speaking of ineffective pass defenses, it seemed at times like Notre Dame and Michigan defensive backs didn’t know where they were, much less what they were doing. Fortunately for the world, the Irish lost, and there was much rejoicing.
Ohio State lost, too (huzzahs all around). No word yet of poo in the coolers and soiled britches outside the stadium.
GEORGIA 41, CAROLINA 37
Why yes, that’s the USC we all know and love. Score a lot, score a little — doesn’t matter. More often times than not, no matter the personnel or the coaching staff, the Gamecocks will screw it up. Much like Alabama, Carolina couldn’t seem to finish drives with touchdowns, instead settling for field goals. Then there was that botched extra point. And not being able to score from inside the 10-yard-line on the final drive.
South Carolina could have won this game and put itself in a position to be second in the SEC East, and a whole heaping pile of luck and Satanic spells from the SEC Championship Game. Yes, it’s still a long season and there’s games to go and anything can happen, as we saw on Saturday. Carolina could run the table and Georgia could lose two conference games. Anything’s possible. It’s just Week Two. But it’s not likely.
